|This site is about the Big Brother 14 feeds and contains spoilers! It isn't necessarily thorough: it's what I catch and/or what interests me, and it isn't necessarily about who will win, who should win, who's cute or who's horrid. It's about watching hamsters: who's doing what and why. If they aren't entertaining, get rid of 'em! Thanks for encouraging my behavior. Your pal, dingo
Ian is Head of Household
Frank & Jenn are nominated
Dan won veto
Frank sits out the next HOH comp
Jenn's on slop for the duration
Nobody is Have-not
BB14 DRINKING GAME
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The BB14 untwist resulted in no eviction, and all coaches entering the game. Boogie was the only one who didn't vote to enter. If all had said no, there would have been a hamster revival.
Willie was ejected for head-butting Joe. Threats & verbal attacks are legal - aggressive physical contact is not.
They're calling pre-show sequester 'convention' or 'knitting convention', and they're calling Diary 'the wizard' or 'dairy queen'.
Ashley revealed they wear earpieces for nominations, at least early on.
CBS shows are Sundays and Wednesdays at 8pm, and live eviction Thursdays at 9pm.
Big Brother After Dark airs midnight to 3am nightly (1am to 4am Thursdays) on Showtime (SHO2) in USA, and on Slice in Canada at various times - check your local listings.
BB14 prizes are the same: $500k for the winner and $50k for 2nd place. The others still earn $750 a week including pre-show hotel and jury sequester. Kara and Jenn may have gotten more.
The coach of the winner would have gotten $100k without the untwist. Returning veterans got $20k to show up, and/or a higher stipend after the untwist.
The habitat has 53 cameras (up one) and 98 microphones (up three).
The recorded in-house announcements are the voice of producer Don Wollman.
All feeds stay on one 'scene' when someone's in Diary.
The Glass House premiered June 18 on ABC and ran for 10 episodes. The winner got $250,000 - half the usual BB winning amount. The glass hamsters went into hotel sequester on weekends.
Big Brother Canada premieres February 2013.
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Salmonella watch (Sunday 9/2)
Joe had just fired up the grill and slapped down his chicken when Big Brother called them inside for lockdown.. Jenn snickered to herself about that while prepping her slop, muttering "Take that, no barbecue for you"
Joe's proven to be a worthy adversary for the replacement grill which is only a few meals into its second season after a less then stellar rookie year.. it's clearly not up to the standards of the legendary but retired metal monster it replaced, but I was ready to notch its first point of the season.. eager BBQ Smackdown fans sat on the edge of their seats, wondering if Joe would defy BB's orders and finish the job on the grill, take the chicken inside to finish cooking it, or just leave it out there til later, but instead he plattered it and they chowed down accordingly
They loved it and proclaimed it "very moist", but as of now there are no reports of gut cramps or worse.. if they don't come, this will remain another non-event for BBQ Smackdown, but I've added the cumulative scorecard below just in case.. salmonella watch continues
Meanwhile Danielle, Shane and Dan actually made an effort at cleaning the bathroom.. Dan continues setting off tiny zing bombs about both Danielle and Ian, as he subtly campaigns for jury votes using his patented mist, while Frank continues to use the opposite and far less effective tactic of loudly villifying his enemies.. Dan & Danielle invited Jenn to join their holy trinity.. Ian continues to believe the Quack Pack exists.. Joe continues to be on to Dan & Danielle, and the others continue to ignore him.. Dan's still using his veto on Jenn tomorrow, and Joe's still going up
BBQ Smackdown Round 1: The Hisser
Still waiting for salmonella to kick in, but these hamsters' stomachs have been conditioned by Joe's hygiene up til now, so perhaps they're immune.. however, the day was not a total loss for Smackdown fans
Having been robbed of its chance to poison them earlier, the clanking monstrosity stepped up its game when Dan went to grill some turkey dogs as a pre-dinner snack.. he poked and prodded the metal monster in its nether regions, and twiddled some knobs, and then it roared up with a WHOOOSH! of escaped gas in his face.. Dan responded like the rookie griller he is with "oh shit" (rather than say, "you freaking beast, I'll have your burner for that!" like a real contender would)
Ian's hammocking never skipped a beat and neither did he when he said "Grill just got a point".. Dan responded "I give him a half point" and as much as I'd like to judge this one like Ian, I have to settle for the half since there were no visible flames, no first degree burns, and no singed eyebrows.. Flashback 9/2 6.21pm to watch the instant replay
Final score: BBQ ½, Dan 0
Dan's still alive (Saturday 9/1)
He won the veto on his birthday, ensuring his safety for yet another week (or til halftime on Thursday's double header).. he was wearing it when the feeds came back since he knows we like them to do that, and he paced the HOH room, talking to himself about finally get Frank out, as he waited for the shower.. it was a messy comp involving corn syrup, hay and grime, and ears of corn with hamster names on them, so probably OTEV.. all played except Shane
Ian and Dan ran scenarios and tentatively agreed for Dan to pull off Jenn as repayment (Ian will feign shock about that and call out Dan for breaking trust), Ian will put up Joe in her place, and Frank will go to jury - take all this with the usual disclaimer that it's only Saturday.. Dan reported to Jenn and Ian to Joe, and Shane offered to pawn himself again
The hamsters keep breaking their rules with no repercussions, and we keep being punished for that with fishies, so I'm out for tonight #bbstrike
Ratings - Future Shock special edition
Ratings are based on infinite improbability, a sperm whale and a bowl of petunias
Just prior to season 15 All-Stars Again, host Julie Chen discovered those feeds she's always hawking had been riddled with FOTH, trivia and fishies for over a decade rather than the '24/7' 'uncensored' 'everything' she'd been reading off her cards all that time. She demanded her husband cancel the show immediately, which of course he did. Julie took 'The Talk' to primetime three times a week, and most of the BB staff went to work for ABC's 'The Glass House', which became a runaway summer hit thanks to its fresh ideas, top-notch casting, respect for its fans, and hefty booze deliveries. Big Brother's former big sister Allison Grodner lived in her car and collected unemployment for 18 months before reuniting with former partner Arnold Shapiro, and the two of them went back to Shapiro's roots, co-producing 'Scared Straight: Prison Hamsters'. Its ratings never rose out of last place, but the Big Brother franchise continued to provide fresh meat and mug shots to keep it going, thanks to their stellar formula of casting past, present, and future jailbirds on the show.
TEAMIES: Kara, Danielle, Jodi
WON: Sushi party, 24 hour disco
After his book 'How to Get on Reality TV' became a New York Times best seller, he went on to mastermind the latest hot trend of everyone webcasting everything to everyone to solve the global problem of having more reality stars than reality shows. Later he penned a memoir entitled 'Everybody's a Star, Including Me', a sequel called 'Secrets of the Mist: Do As I Say, Not As I Do', and retired in Tehachapi, CA with wife Chelsea and their 17 children. Rumors have surfaced that he's recently started a religious cult, but his hordes of faithful followers will neither confirm nor deny.
WON: 24 hour shackles
After BB14 wrapped, she was torn over which of her various career paths she should pursue. After a short stint combining nursing, modeling, and kindergarten teaching, she decided to start fresh and follow the lead of her life coach Dan and write books. Her first, entitled 'Mirror Posing 101' (with special foreword by Jase Wirey), was something of a flop, but she was not deterred. She went on to write the Nobel Prize winning 'It's Healthier To Be Fat Than Not Be Fat And Continually Ask If You Are' which, combined with her semi-successful speaking engagements in and around Tuscaloosa, enabled her to become an often-quoted inspiration to cat ladies everywhere.
WON: $3,341.49, 1 week spiritard, 1 week carrot, 24 hour chum showers
After Big Brother, he returned home to discover 'The Howdy Eudy Show' had been picked up by The History Channel and was already in pre-production. Frank signed on and served as the show's narrator and carrot-suited sidekick to his famous dad, outspoken mom, and towering little brother Gunnar. The show was an instant hit, and grew even more popular in its second season with the addition of a weekly segment featuring Ricky Gervais in a revival of 'When The Whistle Blows'.
WON: $4k, 24 hour dog's life, veto
HEAD OF HOUSEHOLD
After easily winning Big Brother 14 and Big Brother 15 All-Stars Again, he retired from reality tv to continue his studies in thermodynamics and related brainy subjects, and he discovered three new elements that were added to the Periodic Table (Socashium, Clutchium, and ComediumAu). After winning seven Nobel Prizes (two of them the same year Danielle was honored), he became something of a recluse who's rarely seen or heard from, other than a monthly 'The Art of Hammocking' pamphlet that's distributed via underground channels to those in the know.
WON: $1k, Hawaii trip
Upon leaving the Big Brother hamster habitat, she discovered her bandmates had moved on to bigger and better things rather than sit around waiting for her to finish her tv show. She attempted a revival of several former bands but those attempts failed since she went on BB14 to promote her music career but didn't, and nobody knew who she was. She designed and launched a line of black hoodies called ALWAYS UP! but it failed when Joan Rivers, Tyra Banks, and Martha Stewart joined forces to have them banned. She was last seen wandering around Staten Island muttering something about 'slop for nothing' and 'but I won the veto'.
WON: 24 hour hula hoop
Since the spectacular failure of his madlovecooking.tv website and associated YouTube channel, Joe went door to door in Hollywood looking for an agent who'd be able to get his cooking show on tv. As everyone now knows, the closest he got was a stint on Gordon Ramsay's 'Hell's Kitchen'. Fortunately Mr Ramsay hired Dan Gheesling as a character witness for his trial, and the jury was misted into acquitting him for pummelling Joe into a bloody pulp on the show. Joe was last seen at a roadside diner on I-80 where his specialty AVOCADO GRIDDLECAKES is a favorite of one trucker who stops by twice a month.
WON: Veto ticket
Despite being courted by gay fitness magazines and the Hair Club for Men, Shane returned to Vermont where he continues delivering beer and wine for minimum wage. He attempted one more house flip for the TLC show 'Property Ladder' but it never aired because host Kirsten Kemp couldn't stop laughing long enough about his $784,000 loss to tape the end-of-show recap segment. Diehard fans and pranksters continue trying to track down Shane to ask about his relationship with Danielle and the possibilities of a future together, but the witness protection program he's enrolled in prevents him from answering.
TEAMIES: Shane, Willie, JoJo
WON: 1 week safety, 24 hour shackles
She gamed way too hard as a coach and as a player, but she contributed to Willie's pork rind tantrum so kudos for that. She didn't bring as much comedy as she's capable of but when she did, it was hilarious, including early late nights with Janelle and her stellar pre-eviction drunk. It's a shame we didn't get a second season of Just The Tip and that she repeated some of her same mistakes, but she was fun to see again and she'll definitely be missed.
TEAM JANELLE - WON: Nothing
She was ditzy and kooky, and didn't seem like she knew what show she was on most of the time (which fits, since she landed here after being rejected from a dating show). She had back problems that looked legit, and worked in her favor more than once. She brought a kitty-cat sleep mask, creative counting methods, unicorns and dreamboard strategy, and while she seems like a nice enough girl who would have been a hit in 1967, her monotone voice won't be missed.
TEAMIES: Frank, Ian, Jenn - WON: $16k
He started a bit better this time but degenerated to his old self. His friends in production couldn't save him this time around and he got got. His team survived him but only Frank stuck with him til the end, even though Boogie went for cash rather than working to help him. I'm very relieved to see the back of him for a third and hopefully last time, and I only wish we had a feed for when Dr. Will smacks him upside the head.
TEAM JANELLE - WON: $5,000
He came in with the most entertainment potential we've seen in awhile but other than a few spectacular bursts such as his drunken sushi birthday, he failed to deliver on a regular basis. His Sharon Osbourne was spot-on and so was his Joe, but his quick wit wasn't enough to combat the overall doldrums of the season. He fiddled his hair constantly (like Kaysar), and he pinkyswore Janelle out the door. He starred in two of the three 'The Soup' segments to date, and he'll be missed.
TEAMIES: Wil, Ashley, Joe WON: nothing
She was the first coach casualty but she went quietly, robbing us of an updated 'bye-bye bitches'. She didn't have a Howie or Kaysar to work with (or entertain us) this time, and her teamies either didn't know or didn't care how loyally she plays BB. She had some sippy fun but this cast didn't get her shtick, and she had pork rinds thrown at her and mean girl chatter reminiscent of BB6. She drove the early game but didn't play in any veto comps, and that was a huge loss for the season.
TEAM BRITNEY - WON: nothing
She promised to bring it, but apparently she left it on Staten Island since she failed to fight even when confronted. She talked a lot but it was mostly the same loops over and over: she only gets along with East Coast girls, she's street-smart, she's loyal, and she's loyal, know what I mean? She was scouted via Facebook to get here, and that's where she should have stayed. Now she can get back to modeling and piloxing.
TEAM BRITNEY - WON: nothing
(Possibly forfeited stipend)
He spent two weeks laying in HOH bed, parannoying his brains out even though he was perfectly safe, and his fall from HOH was the hardest we've ever seen. He head-butted himself out the door when he might have been saved by veto, so he'll go into the BB blunders pile. I didn't come in with Hantzophobia so I'm grateful for the cheap entertainment he brought, especially the Froot Loops war and Willieisms like 'key-hos', 'corn-ho', and 'totin' pole'. He's the first hamster to pose for his mug shot while his season was still underway.
TEAM DAN - WON: nothing
She brought a big name and rep to the show but didn't live up to either. She seemed like a nice enough girl but she didn't bring much to the feeds, and her sister wife wardrobe greatly disappointed her pre-existing fanbase. She'll be remembered for extra shiny knees and little else - she didn't even campaign to stay.
TEAM DAN, for a minute - WON: nothing
Most were looking forward to seeing what she'd bring, but she got a raw deal and was gone before the feeds even kicked on. She'd said she was worried about lack of privacy & sleep, missing her family, and slop, so maybe BB wasn't for her, and she got away without airing any dirty laundry. It had to be humiliating to go back in for the group bikini pic but that's how they do things.
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!! THIS MEANS YOU !!
Big ups to BB13 Adam Poch and Fara Herzfeld - he finally popped the question and she said yes!
9/3: Veto meeting
9/4: HOH blog, tweets, picture-taking
9/5: CBS 8pm: Veto comp, assorted fiction, veto meeting
9/19: 90-minute finale
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Thursday's live show led the hour with 6.512 million viewers, 2.3 rating and 6 share, ahead of Rookie Blue on ABC, Glee rerun on FOX, and Saving Hope on NBC.
Clicky: caps sorted by day - all caps
NEWS & UPDATES
Along with your $1 text votes and the ability to increase ad rates across CBS.com due to increased traffic from your free online votes, CBS now has an extra $100k that was previously announced as the winning coach's prize. PLEASE STOP VOTING ON THEIR POINTLESS POLLS. Don't even get me started on their idiotic Flock to Unlock traffic and Twitter spam generator.
Thursday September 6 is another double eviction. We have seven hamsters left with a September 19 finale - we'll still need to dump another extra one if they're bringing three to finale again.
Evictee/ejectee Twitters are @WilHeuser, @JanellePierzina, @JoJoDoll1, @HantzBB, @KaraMonaco, @Jodisbox. Imposters are out there - these are the real ones.
BB Australia began August 12, and UK Celebrity BB began August 15. Neither has feeds, but see Links of the Day for quick videos of air shows and related talk shows.
You can still rewatch the BB13 feeds and Flashback on SuperPass, plus they continue to generate lots of original Big Brother and other reality content. A three-month subscription is $39.99 (or $14.99 for a montly subscription) and includes Flashback, mobile for iPhone, iPad, and Android phones, and $10 worth of free music every month: sign up now so you don't miss a thing!
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BBQ Smackdown Scorecard
Big Brother 14
Round 1: BBQ ½, Dan 0
Big Brother 13
Round 1: BBQ ½, Adam ½, Rachel 0
Round 2: BBQ ½, Adam 0
Round 3: BBQ 1, Rachel 0
Big Brother 12
Round 1: BBQ ½, Brendon 0
Round 2: BBQ 2, Britney 0, Lane 0
Round 3: BBQ 1, Lane 0, CBS 0
Big Brother 11
Round 1: BBQ 0, Jeff 0
Round 2: BBQ 0, Jeff ½
Round 3: BBQ ½, Kevin 0, Michele 0
Big Brother 10
No title events
Big Brother 9 Winter Edition
Round 1: BBQ ½, Ryan 0
Round 2, BBQ ½, Adam 0
Round 3, BBQ ½, Ryan 0
Big Brother 8
Round 1: BBQ 1, Dick 0
Round 2: BBQ ½, Zach 0
Round 3: BBQ 0, Dick 1
Big Brother 7 All-Stars
BBQ training sabbatical
Big Brother 6
Round 1: BBQ 1, Ivette 0
Round 2: BBQ 0, Howie 0
Big Brother 5
Round 1: BBQ 1, Cowboy 1, Drew 0
Round 2: BBQ 1, Drew 0, Diane ½
Round 3: BBQ 1, Cowboy 1, CBS 0, Nakomis 0
Pointless HOH weeks: 1½
1 Shane due to untwist
½ Willie self-evicting the day after his
Messy lawsuits: 2
CBS vs ABC
Anthony Marini vs Ashley
Major fights: 2
7/17 10.25pm Willie vs Frank + Boogie
8/27 12.35pm + 12.57pm Ian vs Frank
House meetings: 2
7/17 10.54am Willie & newbies
8/26 7.50pm Dan's funeral
Excessive feeds blackouts: 1
8/18 Almost 7 hours
Diary leak scandals: 1
Wild sushi makeout/streak parties: 1
Additional makeout pairings: 1
8/15 12.15am Frank/Ashley
7/29 CBS Shane/Danielle
8/8 8.28pm Wil/Janelle
8/14 9.36pm Wil/Danielle
8/17 2.14am Shane/Danielle
8/27 11.54pm Shane/Danielle
8/28 11.45pm Ian/Britney
9/2 1.15am Dan/Danielle
Premature exits: 3
Mike, Jodi, Willie
Sleazy pasts uncovered: 1 Ashley
New mug shots: 2
BB5 winner Drew
BB14 ejectee Willie
Editing logistics problems: 1
Jodi's in the group bikini pic
'The Soup' mentions: 4
Wil getting his key invitation
Danielle & Ashley about Shane
Wil about lemon/lime humping
Ashley's eviction speech
CBS goofs: 21
- Mistook Joe for Frank
- Missing/bad URL
- Forgot an important instruction
- Julie's intern polling about something they didn't air
- Staff seen building veto comp
- Old news + a blatant lie
- Mixing up alliance names
- August 8 CBS daytime ad had Willie HOH and Kara/Frank nominees
- Wrong trivia loop
- Another staffer caught on feeds
- Omitting a very important key word
- Calling Shane's shun 'flirting'
- Misspelled Britney
- Fuzzy math
- Staffer caught with the Hamburglar
- Wrong time on CBS main site
- 'Every day' on vets poll skipped 2 days
- Wrong seasons for Howie & Jeff
- 'Biggest cast ever' = same as BB9
- Sailing instructor Mike disappeared
- Their copyright expert used illegal videos to make his Glass House case